What Google Thinks About Your Baseball Cards … and Our Responses

(Check out these other posts that might give you that #FridayFeeling!)

As a baseball card collector in this modern digital era of ours, you undoubtedly count Google among your most trusted online friends.

After all, the search giant is always there for you, just waiting to tell you when that new card set comes out or which Ken Boyer card it was that your buddy Shawn showed you on the playground when you were 10 but that you just can’t quite pull from your own memory banks.

Yep, Google is awesome.

But did you ever stop to think about what Google thinks of you? Or, more specifically, about your obsession with baseball cards?

Well … I did.

So I decided to conduct this little experiment …

I’d throw sentence fragments related to baseball cards at Google to see how our old pal would finish the query. The results were interesting and uncovered some questions that just begged for answers.

Here, then, are the prompts I submitted, the questions and thoughts that Google kicked back, and my responses.

Why Are Baseball Cards …

Why are baseball cards so valuable?

Well, because they bring back memories of golden childhood days and games of catch with our dads.

And because there were up arrows next to them in our Becketts.

And, mostly, just because we love them.

Why are baseball cards worthless?

Clearly, Google is confused. Or maybe it’s just gotten so big that its brain thinks two completely opposite thoughts about the same subject at the same time.

Whatever.

To answer the question, baseball cards are worthless because there are enough of each of them to circle the globe four times and still have enough left over to wallpaper your man cave.

But those are just the baseball cards we grew up collecting, the ones that were going to pay for our lavish lifestyles.

There are plenty of other baseball cards like, say the 1968 Jerry Koosman rookie card, that are worth a lot.

Of money, I mean.

Because if we’re talking about memories and such, they all pretty much win. See above.

Why collect baseball cards?

This one is sort of like, “how much does that cost?”.

You know, if you have to ask …

But we’ll throw Google a bone here because it’s so gosh darn sad to think of anyone — even a corporate giant — so devoid of emotion that they don’t know why someone would collect baseball cards.

So, here are the reasons why we collect baseball cards:

• They’re cool.

Why grade baseball cards?

Duh.

Because grading baseball cards makes them valuabler.

Maybe.

Depends on if you’re a good grader yourself.

But those are the chances you take, Google. And besides, it’s you who seems to be all hung up on how much baseball cards are worth.

Google also gave us some “related searches” to consider …

Is baseball card collecting dead?

Definitely not.

For proof, all you have to do is *ahem* Google “baseball card blogs” and you’ll find hundreds of us out here talking about how much we love our baseball cards.

Or you could browse through our own honking list of more than 450 websites devoted to pasteboards.

Lots of us guys typing about cards still collect them, too, and the local show circuit seems to be heating up a bit.

Not dead.

Best sports cards to invest in

Sheesh, Google! Didn’ you learn anything in the 80s?

Oh, right.

Well, didn’t you learn anything about the 80s?

You don’t invest in sports cards. You buy them because you love them, and then you put them in hermetically sealed plastic so you can never touch them again and then squirrel them away in a dark, cold place so you can never see them again.

But you don’t invest in them.

list of baseball cards worth money

1. 1952 Topps Mickey Mantle
2. 1961 Nu-Card Merkle Pulls Boner
3. 1983 Topps Franco Harris sticker

That last one is only a baseball card like a cat is a dog, but still — this is the complete list of baseball cards worth money.

are baseball cards worth money anymore

Yes. See above.

best baseball cards to buy right now

The ones that are closest to you, and that are for sale.

sports card market crash

Is there a question there?

It boomed.

It crashed.

It’s back.

#MakeBaseballCardsBoomAgain … but this time in a different, better way.

what is the baseball card market today

It’s a 1958 Edsel with the steering wheel removed.

When do baseball cards …

When do baseball cards come out?

An indeterminate number of hours after their mothers go into labor.

Seriously, though, baseball cards always come out later than we want them to.

When do baseball cards become valuable?

As soon as someone pays for them.

When will baseball cards be worth money again?

When the next person buys them — and pays.

Related searches …

Top 100 baseball cards worth money

This one’s a trick … there are only three (see above).

Rare baseball cards from the 1990s

lol

Most valuable basketball cards 1990s

Basketball cards are not valuable and may not even exist.

What do baseball cards …

What do baseball cards look like?

It varies by player and brand, of course, but many baseball cards bear a striking likeness to books or doors, at least in aspect ratio.

What do baseball cards sell for?

Most of the time, baseball cards sell because they have been put up for sale and someone wants to buy them.

Of course, that is using the “why” interpretation of your split preposition, “what for.”

If you mean, “How much money do baseball cards sell for?”, then see above. Generally, though, it’s more than we planned on spending but less than you’d expect to pay for memories.

What do baseball cards go for?

When they’re really hungry, many cards will go for a pastrami on rye.

Most of the time, though, a stick of hard pink gum will satisfy them.

What does baseball card mean?

baseball card, noun:

1. a piece of baseball card depicting a baseball player
2. euphemism for Heaven or paradise

Related searches …

Where can I sell my old baseball cards?

Mostly, where buyers of old baseball cards congregate.

If you want to give someone a thrill, though, put your old cards in a shoebox and sell them for a quarter at your next garage sale.

Most wanted baseball cards 1990

1990 Topps Sticker Back Howard Johnson

1990 Fleer Baseball MVPs Dwight Smith

1990 Donruss Jose Lind

Who buys baseball cards locally

Kids at Wal-Mart.

Do pawn shops buy baseball cards?

Probably. Maybe.

Though no one really sells cards to pawn shops … they’re going to get them back later once their spouse admits how much the house needs the extra spice that only baseball cards can impart.

Donate baseball cards to goodwill

Maybe I will, but I don’t need Google to tell me what to do. Oh, wait …

Others

I also ran into a few other interesting Google-based queries while working on this “research.” Here are some of the most enlightening:

What to do with old baseball cards?

Some options:

1. Love them
2. Look at them
3. Touch them
4. Hide them from other people in your house if they don’t understand or if you want the cards all to yourself.
5. Spruce them up, a la Baseball Card Vandals.

When were baseball cards made?

Prior to today, baseball cards were made on Mt. Olympus and then rained down on the Topps factory in Brooklyn. Starting tonight, all baseball cards will be made by a little old man in Prussia. He will henceforth be known as the King of Prussia.

But that’s more “where,” isn’t it.

As for when … well, baseball cards are eternal. They weren’t made so much as they just are.

When to get baseball cards graded?

As soon as they turn in their assignments.